Thursday, April 16, 2009

Cloudy day

Sure is hard to see that something is wrong with Ireland when she kicks as much as she has today. She has definitely been letting me know she's in there. She is also letting her daddy know that he's a favorite. I swear when he says anything loud enough for her and the world to hear, she moves around and kicks my cervix as if it's her trampoline. Mikey is going to be ridiculously wrapped around this little girl's finger.
...Well, Mikey and his buds are off to Moab today. I hope that the weather gets a bit better. It's been raining, snowing and cold. This is what they'll be going to but I'm thinking by Friday afternoon this should ease up. It had better because Mikey is just getting over whatever sickness he was holding onto. He may put on the brave face but he's been miserable and if anyone deserves a good time, it's him.
....My writing sucks today. I'm sorry for that. I've been in one of those funks today. Like I said, it's rainy and cold. On a lighter note, we have some great friends that have been giving us so many things that their granddaughter cannot use, we received a nice car seat that looks practically new and has two bases. That's awesome. For one, beyond a few things I've made, hangars, and a candle...I've only bought a pair of booties. Sadly, all the clothes beyond a Christmas outfit my mother bought, has been from these friends....and not her oh so loving mother. I'm in this weird place where I really want things but am scared that they won't be used by my baby. This sounds awful, I know but I must be honest. I make things like the eye masks because I know she'll need to drown out the harsh lighting. I make the blankets because i know she'll have something from me to at least lay on that is soft and pretty rather than the standard issue hospital sheet.
Anyway, I'm just in a funk. Tomorrow is a new day. I actually have a baby shower to attend on Saturday and I know there is this part of me that's just jealous. I was trying to figure out what to buy her baby and the cloud just settled over me. I'm shopping for her baby and have not spent more than $10 on my own! Okay, this'll be gone by tomorrow. For one, I am truly happy for her and I know that her and her family have been excited for Mikey and I., I'll miss Mikey all weekend. Most people see him as a jester or some crazy guy...little do they know that for me he's my perfect mate. He's a great husband and my bestest friend in the world. I really do hope he has a great weekend and that when he reads this, he doesn't cringe at who may read this little ending.
And because I don't want anyone to think I'm too terribly cynical, in my heart of hearts, I see my little Ireland Rose healing swiftly and truly being the perfect version of us that rounds out our family just right. I really do, we've wanted her for too long and she's already loved beyond measure.

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